During senior spring, I was trying to figure out what I wanted to do for the summer. Many people travel, others chill and relax at home. I love traveling, but it’s always a daunting task (I like having a routine and traveling throws that out the window). It wasn’t the reason why I decided not to though- I wanted to do something else. I wanted to work.

CRINGE. I know I know. Why work when your whole life starting August is work? That’s something else to dissect (maybe it has to do with growing up with immigrant parents or maybe living in a work obsessed society where you’re shamed for doing something purely for joy and nothing else?!?), but one main reason is to have accountability for productivity. And I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing. I like planning ahead of time because I know my future self will find it difficult to self-motivate (Willpower, as I’m learning, is a finite resource ). Unstructured summers have always made me restless and a little bit nervous. I also like opportunities where I can meet people and learn. Of course there are many ways to do that that are not work and I’m definitely looking forward to exploring them more.

Around March, my good friend V and I both mentioned how we wanted to spend a good chunk of time in New York City at some point in our lives. He had applied for a teaching fellowship program called Breakthrough. Next thing you know, I was scrolling through job postings and came across the Summer Immersion Program Instructor role for Girls Who Code (GWC).

Earlier, I declined to work at the White House as a Software Engineering Fellow for the General Services Administration. It sounded like such a cool opportunity, but I wanted to branch out and do something a bit different than my full time job come August. I learned about GWC in college- it’s a really amazing program with a mission to empower girls in technology and close the gender gap. I was a Teaching Assistant (TA) in college for some computer science classes and served as a tutor previously in both middle and high school. Teaching high school girls computer science sounded right up my alley, and the chance to live in New York City sealed the deal.

It is now Week 6 (out of 7) of the program, and I have many thoughts on this experience so far.

1. Teaching is hard and incredibly undervalued.

   Being a TA is challenging, but it’s not the same as being a full time Instructor. It’s an 8 hour day and then more prep work at home for tomorrow’s lesson. GWC provides the curriculum, which is helpful since it’s thorough and the resources are organized well. But some of the units are unfamiliar territory to me, like robotics and web design. I had to maintain composure and show confidence even when I didn’t know the material well. It forced me to really learn and anticipate questions that beginner coders would ask. And for how important teaching is, there is little acknowledgement and societal recognition for teachers. If we look at impact vs. compensation for teachers, it’s upsetting.

2. Patience is an elusive virtue.

   I knew that I was teaching high school students who had little to no experience with coding. As we all know, anticipation never fully prepares you for the moment itself. Over the course of the class, I found myself struggling to hold onto the thinning and few threads of patience I had. Long work days coupled with teaching computer science (i.e. steep learning curves) pushed me to find tactics to be empathetic and patient- after all, we all know what it’s like to be on the other side.

3. You’re the freaking TEACHER.

   I didn’t fully understand the magnitude of my role until I started. I was the instructor, not a teaching assistant or volunteer. I was the authoritative figure in the room, and that meant making decisions, monitoring classroom dynamics, being expected to know the answer to every question, mediating conflict, etc. There was a lot of responsibility. Whenever something went wrong, I had to handle it. For my entire life, the roles I held always had some kind of protective barrier or safety net around them. I could always defer to someone else if I felt the heat (“I’m only the TA, maybe ask your professor!”). I had to own this role.

4. It’s rewarding.

   Students are working on their final projects now and they are making websites that I would have considered out of my reach when I was their age. I feel a profound pride when I observe their efforts to go above the requirements and exercise their creative spirit. It’s a whole summer for these girls, and I’m proud to have tried my hardest to provide them with a reason to be excited for the next day at SIP.

5. I’m going to miss this.

   7 weeks is a good chunk of time. I’ve learned about these girls, who they are, what they like to do, how they express frustration or excitement; they’re my girls! And the room has an electric energy that they collectively generate. Having been through college, you can say I’ve become slightly jaded. These girls bring a refreshing air to the atmosphere, and it makes me hopeful, for them, for me, for how the world is going to be better as they get older.

Living in NYC has been incredibly rich and exciting- I love living here. That’s in large due to my friends being here and the many visitors that make their way through, but there is something undeniably buzzing about the city. It’s alive, and you can feel the drive, the motivation, the passion that people here ooze.

Coming here has been a great decision- it’s the first summer that I’ve genuinely enjoyed and that has been full of fun since the 7th grade. I’m quite happy :)